Apr 29, 2006

And the Award Goes to...

The following awards were up for grabs, and just went to the same recipient...

  1. Award for game console name most likely to be regretted by a major video game corporation
  2. Award for marketing agent most likely to get canned over a truly unfortunate name
and the winner is... Nintendo!

for taking a great codename for a prototype (Revolution) and replacing it with...
Joystiq.com wins points for the first multi-situational "Wii" list:

The bad puns are already flowing [cough] heavily. A few come readily to mind:
  • I need a Wii now! I can't wait until this fall!
  • "Mum, I finished my homework. Can I play with my Wii some more?"
  • "Hey Mom, Roger's bringing his Wii over. We're going to connect his Wii to my Wii and then we'll play all night."
  • "We are the Knights who say Wii!"
  • Wii Willy Winky runs through town, upstairs and downstairs in his nightgown. Knocking on the window, crying through the lock "Are the children all in bed? It’s past eight o’clock."
  • "Pass me that wemote contwol pwease?" -- Elmer Fudd redux
  • "Do you have any Wii in stock?" asked the customer. "Or course we do," exclaimed the clerk, "Urine GameStop!"

Apr 28, 2006

Neil Young's New Album is Furreeee

Check out Neil's new album here... without having to pay to hear it. And lucky ol' Neil was even able to attract the ire of Fox News. Must be a decent album after all.


Heard a rumour on the radio today that Pearl Jam's new album will be released in similar fashion. I imagine that would be here, were it true. In any case, It's to be sold for a measly ten bucks at A&B Sound on May 2nd only.

I'd get there early

Apr 15, 2006

Rendevouz with SATAN

Puttered down to the southern part of Main street today, being Vaishiki and all. The greatest holiday event in town by far. Nearly everyone in the Indian community sets up a table, business or individual, and hands out free food, drinks, produce, various goodies, which ever.

Just attending the event make you a nicer person.

Politicians love it, and tents from the main three provincial parties can be seen without fail handing out flyers, food, and balloons.

Gordon Campbell came out, dressed fully in traditional clothing, flanked by strar candidate Wally Oppal. Their table was rather crowded as they were handing out t-shirts and shaking hands.

Have to admit, I couldn't resist the temptation, starkly against my partner Natalie's sharp advice to the contrary, to go up and meet good ol' Gordo.

And to be quite honest, he didn't seem to enjoy the situation any more than Natalie did. I doubt he was able to recognize the insignia of the Venezuelan Communist Party adorning my bright red baseball cap in the short time he directed his attention my way, but his smile certainly disappeared, and he seemed hesitant to shake my hand. I guess he's become fairly astute at identifying potential public embarrassments, and was likely expecting me to make some sort of a scene. This is the fella, remember, who hasn't been able to appear anywhere in public without thick security in over 3 years.

For my part, I was extremely well behaved. I shook his hand, smiled, said that it was nice to meet him, accepted his T-shirt, (which will be a great tar catcher on the roof at work) and went on my merry way.

It isn't every day that you get to shake hands with the devil, and I was happy to take part in the opportunity.

Apr 13, 2006

Long Night... Finally

Fired up that GTA Vice City mod I had been talking about. "Long Night," the one that turns the entire city into a zombie infested nutfest, giving every remaining living character a sizable weapon, and a hysterical hair trigger with which to toss yer noggin off at a moments intervention.

Not too shabby for an amateur attempt. The game starts out creepy enough. You're the driver of a tank sitting in some miitary compound out by Vice City International Airport. You've got a gunner sticking his head out the top, and a copter taking off in front of you while the scene begins, with the pilot barking orders at you to get down to the nearest radio station to broadcast an emergency signal, and then meet up with them at a rendevouz point later.

The copter leaves the ground revealing what you've been left to. An entire army of oncoming zombies... and not of the old Romero sort... that stumble along hoping that some 1960's idiot accidently trips and falls into their mouth.

Nosiree Bob, these fukkers are bare a far more striking resemblance to the "28 Days Later" types... the ones filled with seething rage, running at top speed directly for you, regardless of the obstical in their path, with no other goal than to sink their rotting teeth into your tender face-cheeks and rip limbs from your sockets.

And goddamn is there a bazillion truckloads of em. They literally fall out of the sky, off buildings, diving off bridges to get at you. They run in front of your car, try to eat the barrel of your gun, chuckle at your flamethrower. If you're unfortunate enough to accidently exit your vehicle, or drive at a speed slothish enough for one of them to haul your ass out the driver-side door, good luck ever getting back hehind the wheel. If you're lucky, they'll be enough space in you're newly discovered zombie-mosh-pit to pull the rip engine cord on your chain saw, and cut enough pieces away to score yourself some running room.

At which point, yer still pretty much fecked. You'll be able to dodge a good number coming directly at you as you try to flee by pulling off some fancy running work, but imagine a streaker in Miami, 1985, bolting through an anti-Castro rally with only the Che Guevara tatoo on his back to hide his unmetionables, suddenly finding himself the running target of every rabid ex-pat Cuban in the state of Florida... and you've got a small idea of what it's like to be caught on your feet in the streets of this game.

Unfortunately, I can't review it any further than that. It's too damned difficult, and I'm yet to complete the first mission.

I can tell you, however, that the game is a bit buggy. Could be the way in which I installed it. And I can't honestly say that Vice City hadn't crashed on my puter before I added the Long Night mod. I'll likely give it a fresh install, and see how it works out.

Possibly more in it later

Apr 9, 2006

Too Much Billy Jean Will Kill You

It's always amazing putting the oldies up against their modern counterparts.

Case in point, Grand Theft Auto.

Now I'm always one to play the new ones well after they can be considered new, and I've been meaning to get my hands on this particular puppy for quite some time. I played around quite a bit with the original two installments. I've also worked my way through the GameBoy Advance version, which looks very much like a polished up version of the first photo I've posted on this entry. None of those early games were great for kids. All of them were entertaining. But to say that any of the newer versions would be suitable for junior, (GTA Vice City, San Andreas, etc...) would be a mammoth understatement.

These games ain't quite right. But goddamn if I can't tear myself away from Vice City. It must be about three years old already, a couple sequels have come out since, but this game will go down in history as a milestone in the industry's history.

First off, it's an amazing period peice... particularly by game standards. It's pretty tough to consider games in a medieval setting a period peice. So many of them started out that way. Predecessors of video games, Dungeons & Dragons, etc... were conducted almost exclusively under that backdrop. Vice City is arguably one of the first games to make the period of the game a central component of its appeal. Pink everywhere, fashions, slang, cars, architecture, the money, the coke... everything... nails the mid-eighties right on the button.

And the music, another milestone for the industry all on its own. Every time a vehicle is entered, whichever radio station the poor sap you jacked the car from was listening to, begins playing. And you can change the dial to pick up nearly ten other stations. Various genres of music from the mid eighties, along with some talk stations as well. And the latter are quite often the most entertaining. The game developer misses few opportunities in satirizing the McArthyism rampant in the era.

In addition to over nine continual hours of radio contained in the game, the player can import their own MP3's directly into the game as well... all of which are played through a custom radio station that can be picked up like any other. So you can pile in as many songs from the eighties, ( or any other era for that matter, ) as your hard-drive has use for, and the game will incorporate them directly into the action. Quite an amazing little step in customization.

But even more outstanding, is the sheer number of unofficial additions and improvements that can be downloaded and incorporated into the PC version. A virtual army of volunteer programmers have created add-ons to the game from different costumes, to additional vehicles, weapons, missions, etc. Most noteworthy, is a completely unofficial expansion to the game... created completely by amateur game designers, and available free of charge on a number of different sites called "Long Night." Haven't played it yet, but word is the mod alters the entire game, changing it from your run-of-the-mill coke-sniffing, town-running, miami vice knock-off to an out-and-out zombie-thon. 20 new missions are added, and zombies take over the city. Zombies of course, improve any situation, and I can't think of any other way to improve what was already nearly perfect.